Your investigator here with a new report!
It appears that current celebrities aren’t from this time period and Jay-Z, famous American rapper and businessman, is no exception to that.
Renowned American photographer Sid Grossman captured a photo of this man taking a break in Harlem in 1939. If you look closely at this photograph, you will notice that the man captured is no ordinary man.
This is Jay-Z. He traveled through time to the current generation, the reason unclear. But, if you start to look closely at this next picture, you’ll guess why that is.
Jay-Z is hunting for blood. He’s a vampire.
In 1939 Germany invaded Poland. This year was also the start of World War II. During this great war, over 2.5 million African Americans registered for the draft. Although they served in the military, African Americans experienced discrimination and segregation. The reason Jay-Z traveled through time is to avoid this. He needed to be able to safely feast on human flesh.
But, why our time? Take a look at this graph.
The world is massively populated at this very moment and is continually increasing. This gives Jay-Z the perfect opportunity to feast on mortals.
I asked for RPF Commander Popsicle’s input and how he felt knowing that Jay-Z is a time-traveling vampire. He states, “I feel great, it definitely seems like time-traveling vampires are underrepresented in the vampire community, so having a big name like Jay-Z helps the cause.”
I then directly accused Popsicle of being a vampire himself. This was his reaction.
I believe to have stumbled upon one of the greatest conspiracies in history. We must share with others to defeat the vampire community once and for all. This is obviously not a joke!
Break past the limit!
-Junie, RPF Second in Command